Fukitol
I read that it’s only in America
and oddly one other country,
New Zealand, that Big Pharma
can advertise drugs directly
to customers through TV ads,
and I can’t speak for NZ,
but here in drugged-out USA
I can say the pharmaceutical
commercials are awkwardly
pervasive and farcical,
showing people living their
best life snorkeling and riding
bikes and roller coasters
while a nonchalant voiceover
suggests this pill will help
said condition, softly warning
said drug with a bizarre name
that combines part medicine,
part human expression,
something like Fukitol
may cause diarrhea, bloating,
blood clots, nausea, stroke,
cancer, suicidal thoughts,
death itself, and I just shake
my head and wonder who is
buying this shit, thinking wow
I need this at any cost for my
psoriasis in the middle of
an Amazon Romcom, and not
seriously annoyed and blown
away by the absurdity of it all,
then I think, well, if there really
was a Fukitol, maybe, just
maybe, it might be worth it.
Brian Harman lives in Southern California where he received his MFA from Cal State University, Long Beach. He is the author of Suddenly, All Hell Broke Loose!!! (Picture Show Press). He is a Best of the Net nominee with works having appeared in Nerve Cowboy, Chiron Review, Meat for Tea, Misfit Magazine, The Literary Underground, and elsewhere.
