Dear Mrs. Machiavelli:

My reason for this letter is to relay an incident that occurred with your boy, Nicolo. This afternoon I had to step out of the classroom briefly, so I told the children to put their heads on the desk. When I returned, I found your boy snooping around my desk. When I demanded to know what he was doing, he told me he wanted to know what made me such an effective leader so that one day he could change the course of history. That's a first for me, Mrs. Machiavelli, and I don't believe it for one second. I think your boy was interested in some homemade biscotti I keep in my top drawer. I think Nicolo needs a lesson in telling the truth, and keeping his hands off other people's biscotti.

Regards, Ms. Capucci

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Dear Mrs. Machiavelli:

What an odd little fellow your Nicolo is. The other day, as I was reading to the class from the "See Dick Run" series, little Nicolo raised his hand and asked if there were any books where Dick seized power. Later that day, when I was having trouble with several unruly students, Nicolo pulled me aside and said I'd have a much better chance of controlling the class if I used torture. And then, just today, Nicolo told me that, although he didn't think I was a very effective ruler anymore, he still liked me. Then he asked if he could have my head if I was ever beheaded. Is everything all right at home, Mrs. Machiavelli?

Concerned, Ms. Capucci

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Dear Mrs. Machiavelli:

It was good to see you and your husband at the parent teacher conference last Tuesday. I completely agree with your husband that Nicolo is quite the precocious little statesman. I do not agree with something your son said recently, though, that politics is just kindergarten with warfare. And please help your son come up with a more suitable show-and-tell topic than, How to overthrow your kindergarten teacher. I think little Nicolo needs to be reminded that I am the head of this class, and I will not tolerate any overthrowing in my classroom.

Regards, Ms. Capucci

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Dear Mrs. Machiavelli:

I greatly preferred your son's show-and-tell topic, "How to thrive in kindergarten," although I don't think the children needed to be shown how to make a poison apple. And inform Nicolo that no matter how much he begs or pleads or promises me the Principal's office, I will not make him hall monitor. I don't care if he already bought the uniform. And tell Nicolo there is no such thing as hall dictator, and especially not hall czar. Quite frankly, I overheard your boy telling someone that to control the hallways is to control the school, and I already have enough to worry about, thank you. My decision is final.

Regards, Ms. Capucci

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Dear Mrs. Machiavelli:

Your Nicolo is quite the crafty little kindergartner. Yesterday, when I was called out of the class during naptime, I returned to discover there had been something of a coup in my absence. Apparently, little Billy was no longer hall monitor, and your son had installed himself in my absence. I guess I should be thankful it was a bloodless coup, but they sure managed to spill a lot of milk. Of course, I thought I made all hall monitor decision for my classroom, but the principal has informed me otherwise. But I can still punish Nicolo, and I want him to write, "I will respect and obey my kindergarten teacher," 500 times.

Regards, Ms. Capucci

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Dear Mrs. Machiavelli:

I guess I underestimated your son, Mrs. Machiavelli. One thing's for sure, he certainly deserves an A in political science, and they don't teach that until the seventh grade. I am enjoying my time away from teaching, although I do miss it. I just want you to know I do not agree at all with the choice of my replacement. Mr. Pezio was the school's janitor, and he knows nothing about teaching. I know he is close with your son, but Mr. Pezio is not a nice man. I don't see how any learning's going to get done. Please tell your boy to enjoy the homemade biscotti I've enclosed, and please ask him if he can put in a good word with the principal for me.

Very Respectfully Yours, Ms. Capucci