Love in a Time of Gonorrhea

I was talking to Chad, who was going down for the weekend to see Rose, who had misgivings about Kent, who was obsessed about her. One time Kent drove slowly behind Rose in his car because he knew she didn't love him. Guys can get like that.

Chad was telling me about this latest installment, and how he didn't care whether or not Kent thought something was going on between himself and Rose. "We're all adult, you know." He said. "Yes, I know." I replied.

Rose had recently returned from a bohemian European city, and everyone was rather excited about hearing stories. I'd been hearing about this Rose from Chad for months now. Apparently, she's the type of girl that incites, entices, and excites a guy, in that order.

Chad tells me he's got to get away from his thoughts, which revolve around Rose. She doesn't want to get too involved with Chad, because Stacy, who has a thing for Chad, is best friends with Rose and requested that Rose stop any amorous inclinations she might have for Chad.

I'm the nice guy in all this. My father says I should spend one-third of my energy pursuing these girls too. He says that love is nothing more than seeds and agriculture, and that I'm a three-year drought. The other two-thirds of my energy should be divided equally between my future and playing tennis.

Rose and Stacy engage in activities with Chad, get upset, and contact me, in that order. We discuss art, politics, and my problems, in that order. My problems include pyloric valve and not enough flax oil. When the girls call Chad, they discuss art, politics, and my problems, in that order, which according to them includes being melodramatic and not enough flax oil.

Chad told me once that a woman's heart is traced in sand. Later on Rose told me that love is like honey, but that true love is like water. I called them both tsunamis.

Where we meet again is not important. That's what I told Chad the last time I saw him. Feelings were getting hurt and I noticed myself trying so hard to be like them. Just for the records, Chad eventually got with Rose, Kent got with Stacy, and I'm getting fairly good at tennis.

About the author:

Jimmy Chen recently moved to Mississippi from San Francisco. He has been published in Elevenbulls, Bullfight Review, Melic Review, Fourteen Hills, Foliate Oak, McSweeney's Internet Tendency, and will be included in upcoming issues of Snow Monkey. He is currently working on reading a novel.