Category Archive: Issue #5 – America! (and everywhere else)
Feb 01
Henry David Thoreau is The Punisher is Michael Jordan
for the literary underground and tiny amp records putting cigarettes out on what used to be GG Allin’s body at one in the morning like a poisonous snake in the mailbox of the world or a poorly taxidermyed bear in jake’s backyard where gigantic eaglemen throw rocks at undercover cops and comic book artists in …
Feb 01
99 Luft Balloons
As a child I was given a balloon at Fayva buying shoes with Mom I accidentally let go by the car’s back door it flew from my hand went up and up fast with my screams high enough to see all of West Lebanon, N.H. how small and flat that mall surrounded by green how …
Feb 01
House of Horrors
I put out the welcome mat for the murderous spies with communist leanings who are always cramming into my house of horrors. Trembling under my bed I hear the cars pulling up. They took my baby and her pink dresses and beige shoes. Out on the asphalt bullets are hailing as they make off with …
Feb 01
The diving butter fly and a banging bell
If I have a stroke tomorrow and I can only talk through eye blinks it might take me ten years to tell my story but what I will eventually say is this: I had a good time, i was lucky. But I took life for granted because I thought it didn’t matter, and in the …
Feb 01
If I die before I wake, are you gay or straight
I was looking at the back of the world’s ugliest sweater. It’s the kind with the ribbon that goes in and out of the holes in a line of the pattern. You would like it. You think that sort of thing is pretty. We like different things. You like the ornate, I like simple, stripped …
Feb 01
After Watching the Night Porter
I want charlotte rampling to break my heart I want to feel her walk away a cold splash of burning water helpless as a baby in a six foot ditch I want charlotte rampling to break my heart Something so absolute It makes my valve replacement feel like a shitasu I want to be out …
Feb 01
How to call a feminist a dirty little whore and have her thank you for it
You look You look at her You look at her like you can actually see her You look at her like her doubt is the most beautiful thing You have ever seen And you… have no doubt No doubt that one way or another She is going to do whatever it takes And she understands …
Feb 01
Telephone Numbers Die in Los Angeles
If you try to use your cellphone in Los Angeles, you will become really lost and alone, because there is something about Los Angeles that causes cell phones to suddenly be run and controlled by strange companies; there is something in the sky that’s in the air in Los Angeles that contributes to the sound …